Looking up to the sky from the Brooklyn Botanical Garden

It’s hard for me to believe that in a few months I’ll be married to Mike for 5 years. My wedding was unbelievably better than I thought it would be, but here I’m going to discuss one of the lovely events that took place before my wedding – my bachelorette party in Brooklyn.

I lived in Brooklyn for a combined total of 3 years, but those three years impacted me more than my 4 years in college. I felt it only natural to hold the bachelorette party in Brooklyn after having lived in Florida for 8 months because I still felt such a strong connection to the friends and places I got to know during my time living and working in NYC.

Let’s go a little further back to when I was working at Forbes. I met a CSS wiz that was getting married in a few months, and she asked me to go to her bachelorette party. There were a few things that happened at her party that impacted my notion of the golden rules of what not to do at my bachelorette.

a) Don’t impose expenses on your guests, especially if they don’t know ahead of time.
b) While we were waiting to eat our dinner in Times Square, we saw a different veil-clad bachelorette scream out of the top of a limo’s sunroof “I’M GETTING MARRIED, WhoooooWHOOOO!” while waving around a gigantic dildo. My first thought was ay, she’s so silly! Second thought was, that will not be me.

Here was the itinerary for my bachelorette:
1) Picnic in in Park Slope’s Prospect Park (complete with white wine and Hello Kitty picnic ware).
2) Walk around the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens (lilacs and cherry blossoms on a sunny spring day, does it get any better?!)
3) Tea and Coffee at the Tea Lounge
4) Dinner at a French Restaurant called Quercy
5) Belgian Ale at a friendly neighborhood bar
6) Electronica show with my sister in Williamsburg (where did we go again? I don’t remember, but we danced a hell of a lot!)

I made it clear that nobody was required to go to all the events. People were free to show up and attend what they found interesting or what was convenient for them to go to. Aside from my sister and good friend Liz, who bravely stood by my side for most or all of the events, most people just went to 2 or 3. Did I tell you that my Mom and Grandma went to half the events too? I dig older ladies, it’s true. It was cool, and perfect, and worked out well.

What I didn’t get. I didn’t get advice about dildos or fishnet stockings from a strange middle-aged saleslady. I didn’t get grinded by a stripper with a sock in his underwear. I didn’t get a suitcase full of sex toys or wave a dildo from the roof of a stretch limo. I didn’t wear a veil or tiara while handing out condoms or chocolates to strangers. Most of those things either weren’t me or reeked of college silliness. A woman I worked with in Florida who thought she was cooler than cool said that she needed to show up to my bachelorette with her friends and “save it”. Reality TV show in the making or something like that. Bitch, please.

I was a satisfied bachelorette, doing what I thought was fun and totally me with a bunch of people I loved. Ladies, that’s what I believe you should do for your own bachelorette. Be who you are, be considerate of your friends and family.

Finally, if most of you love doing the things I didn’t do, more power to you. Just don’t tell me I didn’t live it up!